After their 2003 attempt at remaking Tobe Hooper’s The Texas Chain Saw Massacre and a 2005 remake of The Amityville Horror (review coming soon), Platinum Dunes gave in to fan demands and decided it best to develop a prequel to their first big hit with Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning, as directed by Darkness Falls‘ Jonathan Liebesman. Of course, we all know that Darkness Falls was a horrendous piece of shit, even without the Puppet Tooth Fairy of Death, so it wouldn’t be too surprising if The Beginning was equally horrendous and shitty. Lucky us, it would seem that Darkness Falls was indeed a fluke, and that the South African director really does know what he’s doing.
Here we are at the beginning of our Platinum Dunes marathon, leading up to April’s month-long Wes Craven coverage, in turn leading up to my April 30th review of the remake of A Nightmare on Elm Street. Here we have the first film produced by Platinum Dunes: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, the 2003 Marcus Nispel-directed horror flick based on the 1974 classic. As it will be with all further entries spread over the next few months, I’ve already gone over the original film and it’s sequels, and now it’s time to get into the remake. Is it good? Is it bad? Does it strike fear into our pitiful hearts or does it suck the paint off a Cadillac? Let’s dig in and find out…
In 1974 John Carpenter’s slasher opus Halloween hit theaters and became an instant horror classic, jump starting the slasher genre and becoming the most popular number one horror flick on fans’ lists. That same year brought the release of the less cited but equally popular and influential Texas Chain Saw Massacre, directed by future horror icon Tobe Hooper. While some lists calling it one of the scariest films ever made may be a tad bit overblown, it should nonetheless be agreed by all parties that TCM is a legitimately great horror flick. Anyone who disagrees is probably an asshole.
Halloween: a time for ghosts and ghouls and other creatures of the night to take over the streets of the nation and terrorize the townsfolk into giving them sweet, delicious treats. While this may not have been the original intent, it is definitely the most beloved form of the holiday, and one which has become perverted by the teeming masses of parental group soccer moms and increasingly brain dead little children. Over time the holiday has become pussified, with trick or treating beginning before the sun even goes down and children dressing up as Johnny Depp in one form or another instead of the more appropriate dude-with-axe-in-cranium. Luckily, some people still understand the holiday and celebrate it in it’s most enjoyable form, and one of those people is writer and director of Trick ‘r Treat, Michael Dougherty.
If there’s one thing I enjoy, it’s British TV. “Coupling”, “The Prisoner”, “Doctor Who”, “Garth Marenghi’s Darkplace”, “Nighty Night”, “Spaced”… I’m a total BBC junkie. So when I slid in the DVD for the TV pilot “Rough Magik”, I was ecstatic. A British TV show (well, unsold pilot, but whatever) about Cthulhu set in the world of Delta Green, from the Call of Cthulhu RPG, just sounded awesome to me. Was I as impressed by the product as I was by my vivid expectations? Am I a nerdy transvestite with a heart of lava rock? Does a bear shit in the goddamn woods?!
I’ll admit to having not paid any attention to Paranormal Activity prior to it’s national success, as I’m not one for hand held POV films in the vain of Last Broadcast. Something about the style just feels uninteresting and oftentimes lazy to me, so I tend to avoid them. However, first-time director Oren Peli’s Paranormal Activity had me intrigued by it’s sudden success with the general public. One friend of mine who had seen the film already told me that he found it difficult to sleep that night. So, driving to the local cheapo Cinemark theater, I got my $2.75 matinee ticket and made my way into what many consider the scariest film they’ve ever seen…
Jigsaw is dead. Amanda is dead. Jeff is dead. Detective Tapp is dead. Detective Kerry is dead. Detective Matthews is dead. Rigg is dead. Agent Strahm is dead. Who the fuck am I supposed to care about now? Oh, the new and slightly pudgy killer Hoffman and Jigsaw’s ex-wife Jill you say? Fan-fucking-tastic.
Meh.
In his third and final outing as director for the series, Darren Lynn Bousman took on a script by Feast writers Patrick Melton and Marcus Dunstan to continue the series while leading it in a new direction. What they created was a gory, fast-paced thriller that marked a beginning to the second Saw trilogy, while shedding light (and a shitload of blood) on Jigsaw’s past.
When the cheaply-made Saw II made bookoo bucks at the box office, it was only logical to assume the sequel was on it’s way. Again it was rushed into production, this time already outfitted with Darren Lynn Bousman as director and writer, with the aid of the first’s James Wan and Leigh Whannel. This collaboration marked the end of what some might call the Saw trilogy and to many more, the end of their quality.