With my current schedule being filled to the point that I’ve more than slipped away from my reviewing process, it’s nice to come back and enjoy the soothing nature of the wordsmith. Rather it be tearing into an old Ulli Lommel vehicle (see Tranny Trash #2) or verbally caressing a modern masterpiece such as Deadgirl, it is simply a pleasure to sit down and let the thoughts flow. By far my favorite form of such leisure is the careful critique of a good, dumb little slice of horror entertainment. Ladies and gentlemen, Joe Johnston’s The Wolfman.
After their 2003 attempt at remaking Tobe Hooper’s The Texas Chain Saw Massacre and a 2005 remake of The Amityville Horror (review coming soon), Platinum Dunes gave in to fan demands and decided it best to develop a prequel to their first big hit with Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning, as directed by Darkness Falls‘ Jonathan Liebesman. Of course, we all know that Darkness Falls was a horrendous piece of shit, even without the Puppet Tooth Fairy of Death, so it wouldn’t be too surprising if The Beginning was equally horrendous and shitty. Lucky us, it would seem that Darkness Falls was indeed a fluke, and that the South African director really does know what he’s doing.
Here we are at the beginning of our Platinum Dunes marathon, leading up to April’s month-long Wes Craven coverage, in turn leading up to my April 30th review of the remake of A Nightmare on Elm Street. Here we have the first film produced by Platinum Dunes: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, the 2003 Marcus Nispel-directed horror flick based on the 1974 classic. As it will be with all further entries spread over the next few months, I’ve already gone over the original film and it’s sequels, and now it’s time to get into the remake. Is it good? Is it bad? Does it strike fear into our pitiful hearts or does it suck the paint off a Cadillac? Let’s dig in and find out…
After 1974’s The Texas Chain Saw Massacre, director Tobe Hooper quickly found himself on a bumpy road through Hollywood. Working interchangeably on schlock like Eaten Alive and The Funhouse while also developing classics like Salem’s Lot and Poltergeist, he cemented his mark while also proving himself to be a highly flawed director. Some might say he was simply given the proverbial shaft by the Hollywood system, who wouldn’t allow him the budget or creativity he required, but it’s nonetheless obvious that his talent behind the camera was like a game of throwing darts. As his career continued, this became more and more factual, with films like The Mangler and later Mortuary coming off more as meaningless drivel than the work of a master of horror. Finally, the two episodes of “Masters of Horror” he directed, which apparently gave him complete creative control, were terribly uneven, with “The Damned Thing” being laughably stupid and “Dance of the Dead” feeling like a hollow shell of another film. The man has not had a well-received career post-Chain Saw, so it only made sense in the middle of his career for him to return to his roots in 1986 with the underrated gore-com The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2.
Halloween: a time for ghosts and ghouls and other creatures of the night to take over the streets of the nation and terrorize the townsfolk into giving them sweet, delicious treats. While this may not have been the original intent, it is definitely the most beloved form of the holiday, and one which has become perverted by the teeming masses of parental group soccer moms and increasingly brain dead little children. Over time the holiday has become pussified, with trick or treating beginning before the sun even goes down and children dressing up as Johnny Depp in one form or another instead of the more appropriate dude-with-axe-in-cranium. Luckily, some people still understand the holiday and celebrate it in it’s most enjoyable form, and one of those people is writer and director of Trick ‘r Treat, Michael Dougherty.
Jigsaw is dead. Amanda is dead. Jeff is dead. Detective Tapp is dead. Detective Kerry is dead. Detective Matthews is dead. Rigg is dead. Agent Strahm is dead. Who the fuck am I supposed to care about now? Oh, the new and slightly pudgy killer Hoffman and Jigsaw’s ex-wife Jill you say? Fan-fucking-tastic.
Meh.
In his third and final outing as director for the series, Darren Lynn Bousman took on a script by Feast writers Patrick Melton and Marcus Dunstan to continue the series while leading it in a new direction. What they created was a gory, fast-paced thriller that marked a beginning to the second Saw trilogy, while shedding light (and a shitload of blood) on Jigsaw’s past.
When the cheaply-made Saw II made bookoo bucks at the box office, it was only logical to assume the sequel was on it’s way. Again it was rushed into production, this time already outfitted with Darren Lynn Bousman as director and writer, with the aid of the first’s James Wan and Leigh Whannel. This collaboration marked the end of what some might call the Saw trilogy and to many more, the end of their quality.
After the success of Saw on the festival circuit, Twisted Pictures and Lionsgate decided to sign a writer and director for a sequel as soon as possible. Taking aside filmmaker Darren Lynn Bousman and his oft-denied script The Desperate, James Wan and Leigh Whannel offered to produce his idea with a few changes under the Saw II title. Bousman accepted the offer and, along with Whannel, rewrote his script and signed on as director. The rest is (Saw franchise) history.